Fort Awesome

Here’s a poem to say how much you mean to me, and how much gladness you send from your heart to mine, each and every day:

You are my sunshine on a cloudy day
You make my sadness go away
When I’m feeling low, I always know
That you’ll have a kind word to say

You bring me smiles and so much more
Like when you found me, on the bathroom floor
Huddled there, a piece of old, cold drool on my chin,
Staring at the wall and wondering why it was so pointless
Such a waste of matter, empty and hollow, like a dead tree trunk
Full of disgusting beetles.
Thanks for that.

If you don’t forward this message on to five people within the next twenty-four hours, not only will you officially be a friendless loser, you (and all your family) will also start to suffer from sores on the palms of your hands, and your womb or testes will become a barren, lifeless wasteland.